It All Comes Back To The Simpsons

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

"Professional Athletes...Always Wanting More."

Despite having the richest deal in NFL history, quarterback Mike Vick, of the Atlanta (worst sports city in the USA) Falcons may have trouble getting more. Getting any at all may prove a challenge after allegations have surfaced that he has herpes simplex-2. The allegation was made in a lawsuit for negligence and battery that he knowingly passed the highly embarrassing virus to evidently naƮve woman.

Now, I generally don't enjoy dragging people's good names through the mud with only allegations to back me up, but his actions, if the allegations are true, are criminally retarded. According to the lawsuit, Vick said he knew he had the herpes when he had sex with the woman, but didn't tell her because he didn't know how to bring it up, and it was not something he liked to talk about anyway.

As mystifyingly knuckleheaded as Vick's alleged statements is the woman's decision to have sex with a man who could have, potentially, had sexual encounters with as many women as 1,000 average men combined. And, for God's sake, she's a health care worker?!? Was she sick on STD day at health care school?

The good news for her is, judging from the glut of herpes-related commercials I have to sit through, this is a good time to have herpes. Those outbreaks shouldn't get in the way of her next kayaking or mountain climbing trip, which, if I am to believe the ads, are common herpes-sufferer activities. I'm not sure about football, though.


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