"Yeah, Well You'd Be Grumpy Too If You Were Taken Out Of Your Natural Habitat And Gawked At By A Bunch Of Slack-Jawed Yokels."

Wal-Mart....Larry the Cable Guy...the mere mention of these words will lower your IQ several points. As a former blue-collar worker, I am insulted at the suggestion that this chain store that reeks of squalor and broken dreams is supposed to always be looking out for me; or that this tired shtick is supposed to speak to my experience and worldview. And I swear to god I hope that when Larry arrives in Hell, he gets a kick squa' in the nuts for each and every "git 'er dun!" ever uttered by his slope-browed minions.

I normally would avoid any mention of L to the CG, but last Friday I was repeatedly assaulted by his visage; first on TV for his brain-dead, lame-ass movie (which I'm hoping I won't hear of after it gets dropped from any theatre stupid enough to engage it for the opening weekend), and again when I drove past the WalMart on the way home.

Imagine my shock when I saw three SUVs in a row pulling into the parking lot, all with "Git 'r Dun!" bumper sticker and/or window decals on them. Yes, sadly, the and/or in the previous sentence was necessary, as one SUV had both motifs of quintessential redneckery proudly on display. Just once I'd like to see this pulling into a WalMart parking lot:







Or maybe this:




Of course, I'd rather avoid the place all together...