"I Just Couldn't Eat Any More Kangaroo Testicles...Funny Thing Is, Now I Can't Get Enough Of 'Em."
More testicles mean more iron!
I know the list of grievances one could bring against Reality TV as an institution is virtually endless, and I'm also aware that bitching about Reality TV is getting to be about as odious as the offending programming itself. But eff that, I have an axe to grind.
My lamentations are twofold, and they were brought to the forefront of that part of my brain that processes indignant rage. The other evening, as I settled down to dinner in front of my television, (which is a bad habit, I know, shut up) whilst flipping through the drastically hamstrung options my tele has to offer, I noticed that Fear Factor was on. Strange, I thought, I though this was a prime time program...why is it on at 5:30? Apparently, Reality TV has now made the leap to syndication. If this isn't a sign of the coming Apocolypse, then it is at least proof that God looks down on His creation with great distain.
While I do find the syndication of reality television disturbing, I more specifically am upset by the content of the programming being aired right around dinner time. As I mentioned earlier, I was just settling down to eat, and as I was changing the channels, my eyes came across the image of meal worms, maggots, earthworms, cockroaches and God-knows-what-else...in a blender...which was then turned on...and then poured into glasses...and promptly consumed, though not without much retching and gagging. Is there anyone out there that actually wants to watch this? If so, why; what happened to them to turn them into such disturbed individuals? Why can't they be like normal people...who watch Fear Factor to see if someone will plummet ten stories to their death after their safety harness fails? Now that's good television (not to mention the secret to success for NASCAR)!
I know the list of grievances one could bring against Reality TV as an institution is virtually endless, and I'm also aware that bitching about Reality TV is getting to be about as odious as the offending programming itself. But eff that, I have an axe to grind.
My lamentations are twofold, and they were brought to the forefront of that part of my brain that processes indignant rage. The other evening, as I settled down to dinner in front of my television, (which is a bad habit, I know, shut up) whilst flipping through the drastically hamstrung options my tele has to offer, I noticed that Fear Factor was on. Strange, I thought, I though this was a prime time program...why is it on at 5:30? Apparently, Reality TV has now made the leap to syndication. If this isn't a sign of the coming Apocolypse, then it is at least proof that God looks down on His creation with great distain.
While I do find the syndication of reality television disturbing, I more specifically am upset by the content of the programming being aired right around dinner time. As I mentioned earlier, I was just settling down to eat, and as I was changing the channels, my eyes came across the image of meal worms, maggots, earthworms, cockroaches and God-knows-what-else...in a blender...which was then turned on...and then poured into glasses...and promptly consumed, though not without much retching and gagging. Is there anyone out there that actually wants to watch this? If so, why; what happened to them to turn them into such disturbed individuals? Why can't they be like normal people...who watch Fear Factor to see if someone will plummet ten stories to their death after their safety harness fails? Now that's good television (not to mention the secret to success for NASCAR)!
posted by Isaac Carmichael at
5:48 PM
11 Comments:
Ok, I'll admit to liking a few reality tv shows. I'll admit it. But Fear Factor is the most horrific, disgusting, repulsive, etc etc, show I've ever in my life seen. Why why why? America's Next Top model...I can understand this...ok, well, at least they aren't dumped into a vat of cockroaches and the plauge for money!
By
Shannon, at Wed Oct 12, 06:20:00 PM 2005
I like Fear Factor for the big talking assholes that end up crying like babies because they can't finish a challenge.
By
Sylvana, at Wed Oct 12, 09:47:00 PM 2005
You are dead on with this rant. Truly? I've never watched so much as three minutes of any of those completely pathetic and gut wrenching reality shows. But more to your point... syndication?
Perhaps if the government was using this as a means to thin the herd, it could be useful. Bad enough people with any semblance of gray matter watch those things once, but to watch a re-run? Come on people. I'd rather watch my car rust. And no, I'm not even kidding a little bit.
By
Weary Hag, at Thu Oct 13, 08:29:00 AM 2005
Man, do I HATE Fear Factor! And Joe Rogan can just go suck an egg for all I care, EXCEPT that he was self-deprecating enough to agree to doing a spoof on FF on Chapelle's Show. Now, THAT was hilarious!
By
ORF, at Thu Oct 13, 12:06:00 PM 2005
We are one year away from someone dying on reality tv.
It's the next level.
By
Shamus O'Drunkahan, at Thu Oct 13, 08:55:00 PM 2005
Bob I am so with you on this. Did it occur to these idiots that there is such a thing as healthy fear....and SELF RESPECT.
You did touch the indignant rage part of my brain. I have one, too.
Shamus- that is scary...
By
Anonymous, at Sat Oct 15, 01:09:00 PM 2005
Don't watch reality shows either, EXCEPT for a show about repo men (on The Discovery Channel, I think). What's cool is watching the really dorky guy picking locks and hotwiring huge tractor trailers and speedboats. All the other repo dudes look like what they are: former cops. But dorky lock pick guy looks like he got razzed every day at school, and this is his revenge!
By
Grace Nearing, at Sat Oct 15, 11:11:00 PM 2005
Reality shows in syndication is indeed a sign of the apocalypse. Worse, there is now an entire channel called "REAL" that appeared on my dish about a month ago that has ALL syndicated reality shows ALL the time. I'd simply avoid it, except that it's right next to Comedy Central on my satellite and I have to go through it from time to time. Frightening! But hey, that's reality for you...
By
Neil Shakespeare, at Sun Oct 16, 02:15:00 PM 2005
Thanks for your comments, Mr. Shakespeare, and I agree with you and sympathize with your situation. Some of us prefer to ignore reality, whcih is why so many people watch tv in the goddamn first place!
By
Isaac Carmichael, at Sun Oct 16, 09:51:00 PM 2005
Seamus, we are already there. I had a fairly good hangover yesterday around noon when I decided to get up, so I immediately relocated to my couch and came across a show called "Of to War," about a National Guard unit from Arkansas. The camera crew is with them in Iraq and also films their families back home. In the couple of episodes I saw (which are total tearjerkers even when your body is dehydrated as mine was) there were dead bodies to be seen. None of the main characters has been killed (yet) but one had had his jaw blown off and was sent home to a son who was terrified he'd find his father unrecognizable.
By
ORF, at Mon Oct 17, 03:20:00 PM 2005
"Iron helps us grow!" Rodd (or Todd) Flander.
By
Maria, at Mon Oct 24, 12:52:00 PM 2005
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